Depression: A daily jihad

 As Salaamu alikum,
Ever since the age of 13, I have been battling depression and anxiety. I have always dealt with it without meds, in large part because I knew the side effects may make me worse than I already am. But lately, I'm finding that option is becoming harder and harder to do . Today and everyday I should be thankful to Allah that I'm alive, that  I have a new husband and I'm in school. But there are some days that I get the blues and other days I get stressed out. And that's when things are going good. Lately, it seems that my anxiety and depression are getting harder to manage without resorting to medication and therapy. Before I was Muslim, it would be easy to go on the meds , go to therapy and be fine. However I have to look at this Islamicaly as well.

As always, depression and anxiety are tools that Satan uses to detract believers from following the deen and strengthening their iman. However, anxiety and depression are conditions that require appropriate management for these are life long conditions. What I am finding is that in the Islamic community, there is a seal of slilence  and backlash going on when it comes to mental illnesses in general. This seal of silence and backlash is causing Muslimahs, Muslims and their families to suffer and in most cases choose not to get help, whetehr through medication, therapy, or even natural alternatives.

At First, i thought about getting a percription  for antidepressants. I thought, one or two pills a day would make me happy and not feel gloomy. However, as this ad explains , the side effects will make you run for the hills.

Plus antidepressants are now coming with a warning that they increase the chances that you will kill yourself while under the medication. But to lighten it up, they say that the suicide risk only happens when teenagers and young adults  are on the medication. Either way, I found it disturbing. I thought the purpose of meds was to make me feel better, not worse.

Inshallah, I will get better and find a way to  be happy with out it being more detrimental  to my health and my deen. May Allah help me find a way to navigate through my storms and do it with grace and honor. Amin.